<Mathematician> If you keep eating nonstop until you've eaten your weight in food, you'll never actually stop, because your weight increases linearly with your food intake.
<Programmer> Nonsense. The user just needs to make sure he's releasing a constant stream of poop so that the weight stays down.
<NetworkAdmin> No, there's too much latency. What you need to do is connect the throat directly to the colon, and make sure it's a big enough pipe.
<Director> Do we really need the person at all?
2012-05-31
2012-05-25
Noisy Bar
"This music bores me. Let's have some sex."
"What?"
"You know, saxophones? A little jazz would be a nice change in mood. Oh, speaking of which, are you looking forward to sex as much as I am?"
"What?"
"Six o'clock is when the live band gets here. If they're good, I think we're going to have some really dirty sex by the time the night is over."
"What?"
"You didn't know? It's tradition to dance in our socks here. That is, if the music is good. Or, we could always leave if it's sex."
"Uh... if it... OH! Yeah, sure. Absolutely."
"Sweet. I'll go grab the condoms."
2012-05-24
2012-04-25
2012-03-25
J-J-J-Jason and the Argonauts
Bernie Taupin, Elton John's long-time lyricist, drew his material from many different sources, which sometimes included Greek mythology. One example is the classic song about Jocasta of Thebes, "Don't Let My Son Go Down On Me".
2012-03-03
Star Trek: The Last Generation
Space, the final frontier. These were the voyages of the Starship Enterprise. Its final mission: to lie at rest in the Starfleet museum, an artifact of a bygone era of galaxies unmapped, civilizations unmet, and knowledge unknown, a time of childlike wonder, when generations of brave men and women abandoned all they knew, seeking answers buried in a sea of darkness.
2012-01-05
2011-12-09
The Newt Deal
<Gingrich> I'm a man who listens to the people. They say to get the money out of politics. Personally, I get as much money out of politics as I can.
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