Global Warming

Contributing factors to global warming:

• Carbon emissions from vehicles.
• Cow farts.
• Disco (disco is dead, but the damage has been done).
• Greenhouses.
• Katie Price Jordan.
• Declining global pirate population (software pirates don't count unless they're dressed in full pirate garb and using wifi on genuine pirate ships).
• Walking to the grocery store.
• Steorn's free energy creation machine (See a demo).
• God's infinite and unfocused rage against people using their body parts for pleasure instead of their original core purpose (I'm talking about you, gum chewers; swallow or spit it out!)
• Firefox.
• The invisible Dyson sphere around our solar system, whose existence NASA has conspired to cover up.
• Terrorists.
• You. (See: Terrorists)
• The increasing amount of buildings and paved roads which retain more heat than dirt and plants. Hey, who knows?
• The melting polar caps. I always see ice melting when it gets hot, so the melting probably causes the heat.
• Al Gore's plane trips.
• Bears.