2012-12-06
Unbounded ambition
Grandpa was a man of unbounded ambition. When he was getting old and we suggested that he get his affairs in order, he asked, "By breast size?"
2012-12-01
Anime production studios
How to tell anime production studios apart:
If the plaid design on the skirt perfectly matches the movement of the skirt with every step and sway, it's by Kyoto Animation.
If it moves along with the character, but sort of breaks and bends in odd ways, it's by J.C. Staff.
If it stays perfectly still with relation to the camera while the character walks across the screen, it's by SHAFT.
If the plaid design on the skirt perfectly matches the movement of the skirt with every step and sway, it's by Kyoto Animation.
If it moves along with the character, but sort of breaks and bends in odd ways, it's by J.C. Staff.
If it stays perfectly still with relation to the camera while the character walks across the screen, it's by SHAFT.
2012-11-07
2012-10-18
And he does not share power
One ring to rule them all
One ring to find them
One ring to bring them all
and in the darkness, bind them
- Mitt Romney's 3-ring binder of women
One ring to find them
One ring to bring them all
and in the darkness, bind them
- Mitt Romney's 3-ring binder of women
2012-09-28
Free way
Did you know that driving 5 MPH over the speed limit on the freeway KILLS PEOPLE?
Driving 5 MPH over the speed limit on the freeway causes vehicular manslaughter, and you could face severe penalties. You wouldn't deliberately murder someone with your car, but driving 5 MPH over the speed limit does kill people.
You might assume that the penalties for driving 5 MPH over the speed limit are equivalent to a single vehicular manslaughter charge, but think again: Every time you drive 5 MPH over the speed limit, it directly leads other drivers to do the same thing. So really, you're causing COUNTLESS cases of vehicular manslaughter, and you will suffer appropriate consequences. We estimate that driving 5 MPH over the speed limit on the freeway costs us billions of lives every year.
Start driving under the speed limit. It's the law.
Driving 5 MPH over the speed limit on the freeway causes vehicular manslaughter, and you could face severe penalties. You wouldn't deliberately murder someone with your car, but driving 5 MPH over the speed limit does kill people.
You might assume that the penalties for driving 5 MPH over the speed limit are equivalent to a single vehicular manslaughter charge, but think again: Every time you drive 5 MPH over the speed limit, it directly leads other drivers to do the same thing. So really, you're causing COUNTLESS cases of vehicular manslaughter, and you will suffer appropriate consequences. We estimate that driving 5 MPH over the speed limit on the freeway costs us billions of lives every year.
Start driving under the speed limit. It's the law.
Reckoning
Bane: I'm Gotham's reckoning.
Batman: More like Gotham's WRECKoning!
Bane: That's... that's what I said.
Batman: No, WRECKoning!
Bane: I said reckoning.
Batman: No, look-- ugh... It... Trust me, it's funny in writing.
Bane: In writing? Ohhh, a pun. Yes, that is quite amusing. You should be a comic.
Batman: Actually, I am. ;D
Batman: More like Gotham's WRECKoning!
Bane: That's... that's what I said.
Batman: No, WRECKoning!
Bane: I said reckoning.
Batman: No, look-- ugh... It... Trust me, it's funny in writing.
Bane: In writing? Ohhh, a pun. Yes, that is quite amusing. You should be a comic.
Batman: Actually, I am. ;D
2012-09-26
The World of Tomorrow
Welcome to a strange new world. This, ladies and gentlemen, is the World of Tomorrow.
There are no newspapers in the World of Tomorrow. Instead, folks will get their news from the television screen. Dozens of television stations will broadcast the daily news 24 hours a day, so you can catch it at your convenience.
As the housewife becomes the working woman, she will have less time to cook a family meal. But that's not a problem, because in the World of Tomorrow, there's a Restaurant of Tomorrow on every street. The efficient Restaurant of Tomorrow can prepare a delicious meal in one minute flat, saving you time and effort.
And how about raising children in the World of Tomorrow? Well, the public education system will take care of those little guys, providing them with food, entertainment, and even a moral compass.
So, get ready to live in the World of Tomorrow. It's closer than you think.
There are no newspapers in the World of Tomorrow. Instead, folks will get their news from the television screen. Dozens of television stations will broadcast the daily news 24 hours a day, so you can catch it at your convenience.
As the housewife becomes the working woman, she will have less time to cook a family meal. But that's not a problem, because in the World of Tomorrow, there's a Restaurant of Tomorrow on every street. The efficient Restaurant of Tomorrow can prepare a delicious meal in one minute flat, saving you time and effort.
And how about raising children in the World of Tomorrow? Well, the public education system will take care of those little guys, providing them with food, entertainment, and even a moral compass.
So, get ready to live in the World of Tomorrow. It's closer than you think.
2012-09-15
I hear it's delicious
Why won't Santa's helpers go to Pennsylvania?
Because that's where they have Filleted-elfia.
Because that's where they have Filleted-elfia.
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