A little miss

I went to Japan to buy a loli from a vending machine, but when I punched in my selection, the loli got stuck. I tried shaking it and kicking it, but she wouldn't come out. Then I realized the vending machine was a car.

Language Barrier

<M> Hello, Miss. I desire ecchi manga.
<F> I desire you.
<M> I don't know a Yuu.
<F> No, you.
<M> I said I don't.
<F> I want you in me.
<M> Look, I don't know who this Yuu person is, and I'm not interested in your sex issues.
<F> No manga issues with sex?
<M> If I did, I wouldn't be asking you about it.
<F> So you've met Yuu!

Should-bes should be

Many things that shouldn't be are.
Many things that are shouldn't be.
Many things that aren't should be.
Many things that should be aren't.

Should all our should-bes be ares and all our ares be should-bes,
should
"many things should be better than they are"
be
"many things are better than they should be" ?

Spaces

The legend is afoot.

Chuck Norris Facts

Chuck Norris lives with his parents not because he's afraid to leave, but because the world is afraid for him to be released.

Chuck Norris doesn't wet his bed, his bed wets itself.

Chuck Norris isn't sucking his thumb, he's using his mouth as a sheath.

When Chuck Norris cries for his mommy, it's really a secret code for something totally badass.

Chuck Norris could easily beat you to a bloody pulp; the only reason he's curled up into a ball while you're kicking him in the nuts is that the thought of fighting back bores him. So, you shouldn't bother kicking him any more. You can stop now.