Orly

In the beginning, there were three sibling gods: Geswhat, Noway, and Yeahway. Today, only Yeahway remains.

Sheep stick

A is for awake.
B is for bed.
C is for can't.
D is for dream.

Real health care reform

I would like to start a public campaign against the legal personhood of AIDS. I submit that AIDS are not people and should not be given the same legal status as people. Most importantly, they should not have the right to sign contracts. I believe that if it were no longer possible to contract AIDS, the world would be a better place.

The Termiskantor

The Terminator time-traveled to the 18th century to compose classical music. He even said so in the movie.

He said, “I'll be Bach.”

Communication

When I'm having sex with a Japanese girl, she always complains that I talk too much. She keeps saying, "Yada yada!"

Advantage

In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is queen.

Height

I used to be 5'10" tall, but then I got a sex change and went to 5'4".

Fetal bukakke

As a proud Christian, I believe that an embryo is a human life, from the very moment of conception. I believe it is deserving of the same rights everyone else enjoys. Yet, some members of our society consider it perfectly acceptable (even recommended, by some far-left doctors) for the couple to continue having sex well into the pregnancy.

Any way you look at it, this is bukakke on a minor. For those who aren't familiar with the term, "bukakke" is a Japanese word that refers to two or more people excreting sexual fluids onto the body of another person. As the embryo is still in the mother's womb, it is subject to all of the sexual fluids exchanged during intercourse. It's effectively a form of rape, and, by extension, incest.

I believe I speak for all good Christian Americans when I say that fetal bukakke is sick, immoral, and must be stopped. The government needs to take a stand and ban fetal bukakke before it corrupts every last child. Studies have shown a clear link between fetal bukakke and evil behaviors later in life, including homosexuality, atheism, and socialist tendencies. We need to put a stop to this godless practice once and for all! Please write to your representatives and make your voices heard.