2009-08-18

Unsubscribe Confirmation

This is to confirm that we have received your request to receive no further e-mail messages from us.

...Then why did you send me this e-mail?

2009-08-15

Every 20 years

Every 20 years, there is an event that defines a generation.

  • In 1929, the Great Depression began.
  • In 1949, Mao Zedong's communist party took over China.
  • In 1969, man landed on the Moon.
  • In 1989, the Berlin Wall fell.
  • In 2009, the first black U.S. President took office.
  • In 2029, a new civil war erupted in China.
  • In 2049, the first artificial sentient mind was created.
  • In 2069, Internet Explorer's usage share dipped below 10%.

2009-08-14

Image pun

Party joke

Joe walks into a room where there's a party in full swing. They're serving various finger foods, and there's a big bowl of punch with dozens of people lined up to get some. Every time someone gets a cup of punch and takes a drink, that person immediately spits it out and throws it into the trash. Joe asks someone in line, “What is this?” The guy responds, “It's a bad punch line.”

2009-08-11

Congress sucks

Congress sucks. All the nooks and crannies are filled with crooks and nannies.

2009-08-06

If you insist

This nation was founded under the principles of deism. We should ban people who believe in a personal god.

Legend

According to legend, states that abolished slavery before the Civil War are colored blue. Also, 1 inch = 200 miles.

Free phone sex

You can get free phone sex if you pick up the phone and press "*69". Just remember to start talking dirty as soon as the phone sex operator picks up.